Pregnant baby-wearing

Yesterday I went to Walmart with my brother to get a sleeping bag for his camping trip, and knowing I was bringing along a crabby, nap avoiding toddler, I grabbed up my ring sling to bring with us.

We got to Walmart, got out of the car, and immediately - "Mama, it's too hot. I no walk. You wear me?" Of course. I don't think I've ever told this kid no to wearing him, aside from when I was on what was basically light bedrest. So I picked him up and wrapped him up on his back and we went into the store. Good thing, too, because he hates sitting in shopping carts and it was packed. He easily could have been picked up or gotten lost in the crowd because there were so many people. Up on my back, he can see everything and everyone and he can talk to me without me having to stop and bend down every few seconds to hear him over everything else.

Anyway, I guess baby-wearing is less popular in this part of NY than in my part of CT because I didn't see one other baby-wearing mama there - no Baby Bjorns, no Infantinos, no ring slings, no wraps, nothing! 

I don't know how some mamas get by without baby-wearing. It's a lifesaver for me!

So, back to what I was saying. I got a lot of confused and curious looks, and I thought it would stay just that - looks, maybe a few hushed comments as people walked by like I'm used to. It's a strange sight where I live in CT to see a mama wearing her baby, it's all about strollers there. Surprisingly, though many people here aren't used to seeing it, many people were interested in how it worked and where they could get one. So I got to tell everyone about my ring sling and where I got it, and how it's saved me in many situations. It was really nice!

There was one lady who stopped me while I was walking out of the restroom and told me how great it was to see a mama so caring toward her child, and who kept her child so close and how happy he was in "that cool thing". Then she told me a story about a baby in an infant seat on a shopping cart - I thought she was going to tell me how the seat fell off the cart, like I hear all too often, but it was actually far worse. I guess she was in a store once and saw a mama shopping with her baby in his infant seat on the cart, and while she was grabbing something off the shelf, someone came up behind her and snatched the seat off of the cart and ran with it. Unfortunately she never found out if the baby was okay or if he ever got back to his mama. It was such a heart breaking story, I can't even imagine something like that happening to me. It did make me that much more grateful for my sling though, and for the fact that I love me some research and learned long ago that it's not safe to keep an infant seat on a shopping cart.

After that, she smiled and told me I'm a great mama with a happy baby, and it made my day. As I left the restroom I was stopped again outside by an older woman who wanted to know all about my ring sling. "How old is he? How much will that hold? He sure looks happy. Did you make it? Where did you buy it? I love that pocket on it! Do you get much use out of it? Are they expensive? It's such a beautiful material. Does it get hot? Is it comfortable? He looks comfortable, but are you?" 

I answered her questions and she was smiling from ear to ear. I think she likes friendly people as much as I do! She told me how she wished she'd had one when her kids were little and couldn't stop telling me how happy my bubs looked. He loves this thing more than I do!

It was a great trip to Walmart, though. No more cranky toddler, this sling makes him go from cranky to the happiest kid in the world in about two minutes flat! And I even got to tell people what it was, how it worked, where I got it - and some of the people I talked to now want to buy them to wear their own babies!

I love baby-wearing :)

Here's a bonus picture of what my Bug and his auntie Kassidy drew on my belly when we got home:

They're great little artists, aren't they? Asher loved it, well, maybe he hated it, it's hard to decipher what kicks mean what. He kicked away through the whole drawing! The kids were super happy to have a canvas to draw on ;)

Pool time :)

This mama spent most of her time behind the camera the other day... and in the pool. Swimming while pregnant is probably the best thing ever!

Anyway, I had a blast taking pictures of my munchkin before I got brave enough to walk into the pool. It's a lot harder to get in and get used to the water when you can't jump in, and unfortunately, this belly full of fetus won't like it much if I start jumping and doing flips off the diving board.

Bug's favorite thing to do all day was push his uncles and aunt into the pool. He had so much fun!

He didn't want to hang out with his mama all day long though. It made it easier for me to swim because I wasn't chasing a two year old around the pool so I guess it was a bit of a win - I got the awesome feeling of weightlessness a pregnant mama gets to enjoy when she's in the water!

And oh man, swimming has never been so tiring before. I used to be able to do laps for what felt like hours, now swimming to the deep end and back I need to catch my breath... and I'm not even out of shape! I dance, do yoga, go for walks and chase a toddler around all day every day. I've been sleeping pretty well after swim sessions, though, thanks to the water sucking away all my energy. 

After we were done swimming we tried to hang out by the pool and have some pizza, but the mosquitoes were terrible. My poor swollen ankles are now covered in mosquito bites.

Oh, the joys of creating a tiny human. Swollen feet and ankles, being a feast for mosquitoes (I never bothered looking into why pregnant women are so delicious to them, either), the fatigue, ahhh. It's all well worth it in the end. And I only have 109 days (roughly) until I get to meet my little bubs. Yay! I have a feeling he's going to come after his due date like his big brother, even with that contraction scare at 21 weeks. I don't mind though. Bake as long as you need to, bubba! We want a happy, healthy, chunky little baby!

Oh, and swimming made Bug sleep well too!

ERF - Extended Rear Facing

*My only recent ERF picture*

Now, let me start this by saying I am not bashing mamas who FF at 1 year and 20lbs. I am all for ERF with my kids and I don't think anyone will change that. My 2.5 year old, who is 26lbs and 32in tall, is still RFing - and he loves it. There is a wealth of information at your fingertips mamas, use it! Do your research! What I hope to do with this post is dispel some ERF myths.

For instance, "FF at 1 and 20lbs is just as safe as RF past that."

Quite frankly, no, it's not. Even the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) recommends RFing until 2 years old and 30lbs. Why, though?

In most accidents, a RFing baby/toddler is 5 times safer than a FF baby/toddler. The seat takes the bulk of the impact and helps to distribute it over the whole body, thus protecting your child moreso than if the seat was FF and didn't take most of the damage. When a child is facing forward, their head and neck move forward abruptly and it can cause neck/spinal damage. 

"My child won't be comfortable RFing. He's too tall."

If he's not exceeding the seat's requirements, he's not too tall. My son is 32 inches tall, his feet reach the back of the seat, and he's comfortable even on long car rides. There are many positions for a baby/toddler to put his legs when RFing. My son likes to sit cross legged... or with his knees bent, or resting on the top of the back seat, or out to the sides of the car seat. He never complains that he's uncomfortable, but honestly, I think that a small bit of discomfort is worth his safety.

"I don't want to keep her in an infant seat."

I'm not sure where parents get the notion that to ERF they need to keep their child in an infant, or "bucket" seat. That's absurd. A convertible seat works (generally) from 5lbs to that specific seat's weight/height requirements. There's absolutely no need to keep her in an infant seat, which she'll likely quickly outgrow anyway.

"I'm on a budget, I can't afford to ERF."

Budget? Welcome to my life! We have a convertible Cosco seat, nifty design, double cup holders, 5lbs all the way to 40lbs and 40 inches. Side impact protection, all that great stuff. And it didn't burn a hole in our bank account. This awesome seat cost us a grand total of $60, and it wasn't even on sale. We paid full price, brand new, and only $60. Pretty nifty, I think. And it gets better - if you get a seat like this and plan to ERF it could actually be cheaper for you in the long run. Instead of shelling out $60-$250 for an infant seat and $60-$350 for the convertible car seat you're going to buy just to FF in when your little one outgrows her infant seat, you could buy the convertible and be done with it. Just buy one seat! Nicer to your wallet, and safer for that little bundle of joy you brought into the world. 

"My son gets bored, he needs to face forward or he'll cry."

If he's never FF, he doesn't even know what he's "missing". All you've gotta do is pack some toys for the ride! A car ride will bore any toddler/child, anyway. Another thing that may help is installing a shatter-proof baby mirror on the backseat - so you can see your kiddo, and he can see you, too. Bring a CD of some fun songs he likes, or a picture book for him to read. His safety is more important than him being bored, mama!

*And please, please keep these things in mind:

- A chest clip is a chest clip for a reason. It should be placed on the chest, NOT the belly. Placing a chest clip over the belly could result in severe internal damage in the even of an accident.

-Straps should be snug. You should not be able to pinch them. They also should not be twisted (or washed for that matter). All of these things affect the quality of the straps and their ability to help in an accident.

-Winter jackets should NOT be worn in a carseat. These jackets are puffy and will compress in a car accident, therefore compromising your child's safety and increasing the risk of your child being expelled from the car seat.

-Make sure your baby/toddler has not exceeded the height/weight requirements of the car seat. The seats only test safely to those requirements.

-Don't buy a used car seat! A seat should be replaced after every crash, as damage is done to the seat in a crash and will be significantly less effective. Many people selling their old car seats neglect to mention whether the seat was in a crash, and sometimes even lie about it to get rid of the seat.

-Check your seat's expiration dates. Yup, car seats expire! Typically 4-7 years after the manufacture date. You can normally find the date imprinted somewhere on your seat. It's important to toss an expired car seat because the plastic shell can become brittle and not protect well in an accident, and the straps can wear down (even if they're not being used) and give in an accident, expelling the child from the seat.

Remember mamas (and dads!) do your research! A couple of hours of research could save your child's life. A fair trade if you ask me! :)

A letter to my (temporarily) only child...

You are the sweetest two year old ever. You are the first person to have ever taught me what true love really is. You've helped me grow, not only as a mama, but as a person. You're my world. You have the most beautiful blue eyes and the cutest smile, and your bedhead is even the most adorable mess I have ever seen. There's nothing I love more than being there and watching and helping you grow day after day. I don't know who I would be, or where I would be without you. You've been my only baby for two and a half years, and come October it won't just be you anymore. It'll be you and Asher. I'll never love you less, and I'll love Asher just as much. I hope it doesn't stress you out to share your mama with your brother. 

You'll have been an only child for nearly three years when he arrives, so I expect it to come as a shock to you when you realize he's here to stay - that we're not babysitting, no one is going to come to the house to pick him up and take him home, because our home is his home as well. 

It's so very important to me that you know once Ash arrives you will not be any less special. You will not be any less loved. I don't know how to explain it to you because you're so little, but mama loves you just as much now as in October, and every month, year, and decade afterward. There's nothing you or I could do to make me love you any less than I do right this instant. 

I'm not even quite sure yet how I'm going to adjust to the new baby. I'll admit that some days I cry because I get sad thinking about how you won't have our 100% focus anymore - but you'll still have our 100% love. You're my whole world and soon Asher will be too. 

Last night when we were going to sleep and you were laying in my arm, with your head on my shoulder like you've slept since day one, it was the most bittersweet moment. I remember you when you were just a few hours old, sleeping the same way, and now it's two and a half years later and I know these days will soon come to an end. You're turning into a big boy and you like to sleep in your big boy bed, and it's bittersweet because I'll miss those snuggles, but I'm so proud of you for being so independent. 

To see what you can do now compared to when you came home makes my heart swell with pride. You're such a well mannered and (usually) well behaved little boy. It's going to be strange to bring home a little baby that can't do anything but sleep, poop and nurse like you did when you came home.

Anyway, I'm rambling. I want you to know that you are perfect to me, and I'll love you forever. I hope you never feel second to your baby brother, I hope you never feel left out or forgotten, and I hope that if you do feel any of these things, you tell me so I can fix it. It's gonna be tough, bub, I won't lie. There's going to be tears, there will be feelings of jealousy... but always remember that I love you, and I love Asher just the same as I love you. No more, no less. 

I love you, baby boy, forever and ever. Don't you ever forget it.

24 weeks!

Hello viability!

This week Ash is about 10.5 inches long, and the size of a cantaloupe. His skin is less see-through and more of a glowy, opaque pink color. His movements increase in strength and frequency every day! I love feeling my bubs move around.

I have heartburn bad enough that I've been sleeping sitting up - thank god we have a comfortable couch! It's not too difficult to stay hydrated during the summer when it's just you, but apparently it's next to impossible for me to stay hydrated with Asher as a womb-mate. I try, though! Nearly every day I've ended up in the house, laying down for an hour or two and chugging glass after glass of water to re-hydrate myself. Who's bladder DOESN'T love a water overload? Asher thinks it makes a nice punching bag when it's full.

Anyway, we're visiting my dad for a week or two. It's nice to be away from everything. Noah's having a blast with his aunt and his uncles and his "bampah" (grandpa). He even got a wiffle ball and bat and some new flip flops!

He's been having tons of fun, and lots of it happens on the trampoline. The top left is his uncle Johnny helping him off the trampoline, top right is him and his aunt Kassidy playing on the trampoline, bottom left is snuggles for uncle Anthony and bottom right is getting ready for a walk with uncle Vinny. He loves his big, Italian family hahaha. There's little more that makes him happier than playing with them.

Except maybe playing with the chickens:

I love the chickens because they're cute, eat ticks and ensure a fresh breakfast for everyone ;) Having chickens is pretty awesome I think, I can't wait to have my own when we own a house!